I don't understand these people who want the Occupy crowds to stop protesting and go back to work.
Do they seriously believe that many of those people are camped out day after day because they have jobs or even a home to go to? Or is the media inventing the 9% or higher unemployment statistics?
It's funny that the naysayers want to blame Obama for the continued high unemployment, but they also want to believe that the protesters are just a bunch of spoiled hippies who just happened to wander by the park on the way to buy some ganja from their supplier and decided to hold an impromptu party.
In fact, I find it particularly interesting that many of the initial hoards of unemployed after the financial meltdown no longer have unemployment benefits.
Finally, let me close by saying that we in America are trying to sell the concept of American-style democracy to the rest of the world--especially the Middle East. What example do we set when our cops randomly pepper spray people who are peaceably protesting?
They look at that and see that our way doesn't give them the freedoms that they desire.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Where Do Your Lottery Riches Go?
The other day, I overheard some people hating on a young attorney for being "cheap" because he doesn't go crazy with spending. After all, this young attorney made so much money that he should be living like a king!
I'll pause here to let the chuckling die down.
After all, those of us "in the know" know that we don't get to keep all of those glorious riches. Haters usually don't take into account that attorneys not only have bills, but they have unique expenses.
I thought about it for a while, and decided that this is as good a time (as any) to discuss what happens to your money as a young attorney. For sake of argument, let's say that young attorney makes $50,000 a year.
The federal government takes a bigger cut.
Now, I know that people made fun of that law professor not long ago for not having enough left over to pay for undocumented workers to be paid in peanuts to cut his lawn if the Bush tax cuts went away. However, nobody really pays attention to what happens on a smaller scale for people who aren't making anywhere near that amount. If the attorney has taxable income of $50,000 per year, they pay a 25% tax rate on every dollar they make over $34,500. In contrast, people who have a taxable income between $8,500 and $34,500 pay a 15% tax rate on every dollar they make over $8,500. Not that I'm necessarily complaining about paying taxes since I like having services, but it is a fact that an additional 10% above $34,500 goes away.
Self Employment Taxes
For those not lucky enough to find work in a firm (or those unlucky to work in scummy firms who won't withhold your income tax), you get the privilege of paying self employment tax. This amount is double what an employed person earns. Of course, the upside is that it is that it is much easier to deduct expenses such as bar dues that would not otherwise count if you don't have enough to itemize.
Student Loan Debt
I don't know what it is, but people think that schools hand out law degrees for free. They think that if you pay $12,000 a year in student loan payments that you still get to keep that $12,000.
Ah, but don't they offer income based repayment?
Why sure! In that scenario, you can exchange living off of ramen noodles for 10 years to get rid of them for paying a "manageable" amount for the next 25+ years that you could have bought a house with the additional interest that you paid.
Donations to Campaigns
If you live in an area where the judges are not appointed, you are expected to donate money to election campaigns. Through donations and a combination of schmoozing at social events, the attorney helps, er, put their clients interests in a good light. Yeah, that's it....
Social Events
At the end of your workday, you don't simply go home a lot of the time. No. Marketing yourself is a 24 hour a day task. Whether you belong to the Junior League or the Masons, your lunches and evenings are spent at meetings.
And people don't simply expect you to show up to a meeting, nod your head in agreement, and go home. No, that is for losers. If you were very smart, you would put yourself in charge of a committee that spends months organizing a big event. That way, it makes you look like a responsible individual to people who don't know you that well.
If that wasn't enough, you are also supposed to attend silent auctions and charity events. Again, your attendance is not good enough. If they are selling a basket of bath soaps, you are supposed to bid on them and preferably win.
The Trick or Treat Syndrome
Do you remember how people round up their kids and drive them over to the "rich" neighborhoods to go trick or treating because they give out all of the "good" candy? One lady I know said that one year, she had over 500 trick or treaters come to their door because she lived in the "good" neighborhood.
When Christmas rolls around, you can't afford to cheap out with either your bosses or underlings and giving presents. A good present to your boss shows that you are thankful to have a job. A good present to your support staff is expected as a thank you for putting up with your bullshit all year. Also, donuts and fruit baskets to the court's support staff also helps because you're going to screw up and you're going to need them to remember you as the individual who brought them donuts last week in helping you fix the error so that you won't be sued by your client for malpractice.
This also extends outside of the office. People two floors down from your office somehow magically make their way in the door and expect you to buy candy bars for their kid's PTA, pledge for their walk to combat breast cancer, and buy candles, wrapping paper, and tickets for cook offs. Sure, you can use the excuse that you don't have any money or you are on a diet, but you don't know if you're burning the bridge with a potential client, do you?
This leads me too...
Keeping up Appearances
At one time, I used to laugh at the idea that a nice car and clothes were legitimate business expenses, but what do people think of attorneys that show up to court in a beater? They certainly don't think that the attorney is simply being reasonable and trying to keep the student loan people from harassing them.
Trust me, I've tried that conversation with people. They don't want to hear it. If you don't have the goodies, that is a red flag that there is something wrong with you.
I don't know if any of you have ever read the book The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood, but there is a scene at a country club where the older lady is teaching the younger lady how she should act now that she had substantial money.
The older lady told her, "Don't talk loudly at the waiters. Make the waiters lean in to listen to you. They expect it."
Yes, its incredibly bitchy to treat the staff like that, but that exchange has a specific point that is echoed when some of the non-attorneys make merriment of your economic misfortune.
I will give this example:
My grandmother and grandpa lived in a house that was in such bad condition that you could hear rats in the attic at night. Eventually, she went to work in real estate to earn some extra income.
My grandma bought a Lincoln, wore diamonds, and bought clothes from the nice boutiques. Not only that, she did not screw over clients. She had a 30+ year career in real estate that survived the busts.
In contrast, the realtor that my parents used a few years ago drove a beater (that could stand to be cleaned) and always acted like he would rather be somewhere else. In fact, he once said that he had a nicer car, but used the junker for work because it was cheaper for liability purposes. For a couple of years after my parents bought their property, the realtor used to mail circulars to them to keep him in mind. After the real estate bust, the circulars mysteriously went away. I assume the guy is flipping burgers somewhere.
Not that my grandmother and grandfather ever moved out of the neighborhood, mind you. It ended up being an assurance that she still had a job.
Moral of the story: In a people business you can't afford to cheap out in the eyes of your clients. On one hand, people are annoyed that you are driving around in a Hummer while you ran off with their last dime. On the other hand, they want to hire the attorney who drives the Hummer because it means that this attorney is legitimate and can get their clients results.
So, yeah, the truth is that the nature of the business doesn't allow you to simply get 10 years of use out of your beat up old Civic even if you were perfectly happy with your old car.
I'll pause here to let the chuckling die down.
After all, those of us "in the know" know that we don't get to keep all of those glorious riches. Haters usually don't take into account that attorneys not only have bills, but they have unique expenses.
I thought about it for a while, and decided that this is as good a time (as any) to discuss what happens to your money as a young attorney. For sake of argument, let's say that young attorney makes $50,000 a year.
The federal government takes a bigger cut.
Now, I know that people made fun of that law professor not long ago for not having enough left over to pay for undocumented workers to be paid in peanuts to cut his lawn if the Bush tax cuts went away. However, nobody really pays attention to what happens on a smaller scale for people who aren't making anywhere near that amount. If the attorney has taxable income of $50,000 per year, they pay a 25% tax rate on every dollar they make over $34,500. In contrast, people who have a taxable income between $8,500 and $34,500 pay a 15% tax rate on every dollar they make over $8,500. Not that I'm necessarily complaining about paying taxes since I like having services, but it is a fact that an additional 10% above $34,500 goes away.
Self Employment Taxes
For those not lucky enough to find work in a firm (or those unlucky to work in scummy firms who won't withhold your income tax), you get the privilege of paying self employment tax. This amount is double what an employed person earns. Of course, the upside is that it is that it is much easier to deduct expenses such as bar dues that would not otherwise count if you don't have enough to itemize.
Student Loan Debt
I don't know what it is, but people think that schools hand out law degrees for free. They think that if you pay $12,000 a year in student loan payments that you still get to keep that $12,000.
Ah, but don't they offer income based repayment?
Why sure! In that scenario, you can exchange living off of ramen noodles for 10 years to get rid of them for paying a "manageable" amount for the next 25+ years that you could have bought a house with the additional interest that you paid.
Donations to Campaigns
If you live in an area where the judges are not appointed, you are expected to donate money to election campaigns. Through donations and a combination of schmoozing at social events, the attorney helps, er, put their clients interests in a good light. Yeah, that's it....
Social Events
At the end of your workday, you don't simply go home a lot of the time. No. Marketing yourself is a 24 hour a day task. Whether you belong to the Junior League or the Masons, your lunches and evenings are spent at meetings.
And people don't simply expect you to show up to a meeting, nod your head in agreement, and go home. No, that is for losers. If you were very smart, you would put yourself in charge of a committee that spends months organizing a big event. That way, it makes you look like a responsible individual to people who don't know you that well.
If that wasn't enough, you are also supposed to attend silent auctions and charity events. Again, your attendance is not good enough. If they are selling a basket of bath soaps, you are supposed to bid on them and preferably win.
The Trick or Treat Syndrome
Do you remember how people round up their kids and drive them over to the "rich" neighborhoods to go trick or treating because they give out all of the "good" candy? One lady I know said that one year, she had over 500 trick or treaters come to their door because she lived in the "good" neighborhood.
When Christmas rolls around, you can't afford to cheap out with either your bosses or underlings and giving presents. A good present to your boss shows that you are thankful to have a job. A good present to your support staff is expected as a thank you for putting up with your bullshit all year. Also, donuts and fruit baskets to the court's support staff also helps because you're going to screw up and you're going to need them to remember you as the individual who brought them donuts last week in helping you fix the error so that you won't be sued by your client for malpractice.
This also extends outside of the office. People two floors down from your office somehow magically make their way in the door and expect you to buy candy bars for their kid's PTA, pledge for their walk to combat breast cancer, and buy candles, wrapping paper, and tickets for cook offs. Sure, you can use the excuse that you don't have any money or you are on a diet, but you don't know if you're burning the bridge with a potential client, do you?
This leads me too...
Keeping up Appearances
At one time, I used to laugh at the idea that a nice car and clothes were legitimate business expenses, but what do people think of attorneys that show up to court in a beater? They certainly don't think that the attorney is simply being reasonable and trying to keep the student loan people from harassing them.
Trust me, I've tried that conversation with people. They don't want to hear it. If you don't have the goodies, that is a red flag that there is something wrong with you.
I don't know if any of you have ever read the book The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood, but there is a scene at a country club where the older lady is teaching the younger lady how she should act now that she had substantial money.
The older lady told her, "Don't talk loudly at the waiters. Make the waiters lean in to listen to you. They expect it."
Yes, its incredibly bitchy to treat the staff like that, but that exchange has a specific point that is echoed when some of the non-attorneys make merriment of your economic misfortune.
I will give this example:
My grandmother and grandpa lived in a house that was in such bad condition that you could hear rats in the attic at night. Eventually, she went to work in real estate to earn some extra income.
My grandma bought a Lincoln, wore diamonds, and bought clothes from the nice boutiques. Not only that, she did not screw over clients. She had a 30+ year career in real estate that survived the busts.
In contrast, the realtor that my parents used a few years ago drove a beater (that could stand to be cleaned) and always acted like he would rather be somewhere else. In fact, he once said that he had a nicer car, but used the junker for work because it was cheaper for liability purposes. For a couple of years after my parents bought their property, the realtor used to mail circulars to them to keep him in mind. After the real estate bust, the circulars mysteriously went away. I assume the guy is flipping burgers somewhere.
Not that my grandmother and grandfather ever moved out of the neighborhood, mind you. It ended up being an assurance that she still had a job.
Moral of the story: In a people business you can't afford to cheap out in the eyes of your clients. On one hand, people are annoyed that you are driving around in a Hummer while you ran off with their last dime. On the other hand, they want to hire the attorney who drives the Hummer because it means that this attorney is legitimate and can get their clients results.
So, yeah, the truth is that the nature of the business doesn't allow you to simply get 10 years of use out of your beat up old Civic even if you were perfectly happy with your old car.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Unemployment: It's Hard on the Body
I exercise pretty regularly.
Even when I was unemployed, I normally went walking about two hours a day. I kinda watched what I ate, and I considered myself fairly fit.
However, my girth expanded a tad. True, I wasn't close to wearing Women's sizes, but there was a bit of a difference.
Ok. You realize that even if you go out walking about 2 hours a day that there is still the time that you sat around or slept in. Plus, you can eat things like vast quantities of spaghetti at lunch instead of making due with the portions in your TV dinner. But it wasn't merely weight gain.
My knees creaked and I walked around as stiff as all get out.
I'm not very old compared to the usual person who has this problem, but I had some problems with agility. And it didn't really happen gradually. It felt like it became noticeable during my unemployment.
I wasn't sure if I would get it back, or if this signaled the downhill slide that came with age. I used to use equipment at the school gym, and considering that I still made it a point to get exercise on a daily basis I didn't see much hope for returning to how things were when I was in my 20s.
It took a year of working out with Yoga and cardio exercises, but my knees felt "normal" again.
And I had never really done any of those exercises in any quantity before all of this happened.
It took a few months for the creaky feeling to go away. It took even longer for the stiffness to leave.
It's like I had to spend an entire year rebuilding myself from what I considered to be a very non-physically demanding lifestyle.
Even when I was unemployed, I normally went walking about two hours a day. I kinda watched what I ate, and I considered myself fairly fit.
However, my girth expanded a tad. True, I wasn't close to wearing Women's sizes, but there was a bit of a difference.
Ok. You realize that even if you go out walking about 2 hours a day that there is still the time that you sat around or slept in. Plus, you can eat things like vast quantities of spaghetti at lunch instead of making due with the portions in your TV dinner. But it wasn't merely weight gain.
My knees creaked and I walked around as stiff as all get out.
I'm not very old compared to the usual person who has this problem, but I had some problems with agility. And it didn't really happen gradually. It felt like it became noticeable during my unemployment.
I wasn't sure if I would get it back, or if this signaled the downhill slide that came with age. I used to use equipment at the school gym, and considering that I still made it a point to get exercise on a daily basis I didn't see much hope for returning to how things were when I was in my 20s.
It took a year of working out with Yoga and cardio exercises, but my knees felt "normal" again.
And I had never really done any of those exercises in any quantity before all of this happened.
It took a few months for the creaky feeling to go away. It took even longer for the stiffness to leave.
It's like I had to spend an entire year rebuilding myself from what I considered to be a very non-physically demanding lifestyle.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Back in My Day, We Had Fun Parties!
If only I had a picture to contrast two representative Halloween parties.
Which one sounds more fun?
At one party, people are laughing, wearing fun costumes, eating interesting foods, and engaging in creative activities such as pumpkin carving.
At another party, people are sitting around and staring at their phones.
Which one sounds more fun?
At one party, people are laughing, wearing fun costumes, eating interesting foods, and engaging in creative activities such as pumpkin carving.
At another party, people are sitting around and staring at their phones.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Who is in Charge Here?
As pointed out by John Stewart, the Tea Party and Occupy Wall Street have very similar agendas, but they are aimed and different people.
The Tea Party wants the government to back off because it blamed the government for this mess.
The Occupy Wall Street wants corporations to back off because they blamed the corporations for irresponsible and illegal activities upon the economic situation.
The Tea Party eventually became a relatively successful political movement with sympathizers being elected to office-holding positions in the Republican Party.
Do you think that the Democrats are going to respond in kind to Occupy Wall Street sympathizers, even though it is picking up steam across the nation?
I hear crickets chirping. The politicians are not going anywhere near that stuff.
That, my friends, tells you who is really running the show at the end of the day.
The Tea Party wants the government to back off because it blamed the government for this mess.
The Occupy Wall Street wants corporations to back off because they blamed the corporations for irresponsible and illegal activities upon the economic situation.
The Tea Party eventually became a relatively successful political movement with sympathizers being elected to office-holding positions in the Republican Party.
Do you think that the Democrats are going to respond in kind to Occupy Wall Street sympathizers, even though it is picking up steam across the nation?
I hear crickets chirping. The politicians are not going anywhere near that stuff.
That, my friends, tells you who is really running the show at the end of the day.
Friday, October 7, 2011
"Hi, I make $50,000 per year."
I had an idea for a documentary or news story.
Someone should contrast the lives of at least two people who live in an area with the same cost of living and spending patterns who make about the same amount of money per year, have the same attitude towards spending, and who bought a house at the same stage of life (if possible).
HOWEVER, they should take someone who graduated from school about 15 years ago and compare them with someone who graduated about 5 years ago and compare how much money they have to spend on food, entertainment, and incidentals after they make their monthly student loan and mortgage/rent payment.
Someone should contrast the lives of at least two people who live in an area with the same cost of living and spending patterns who make about the same amount of money per year, have the same attitude towards spending, and who bought a house at the same stage of life (if possible).
HOWEVER, they should take someone who graduated from school about 15 years ago and compare them with someone who graduated about 5 years ago and compare how much money they have to spend on food, entertainment, and incidentals after they make their monthly student loan and mortgage/rent payment.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Sliding Back to Employment
I watch the show Hoarders on a regular basis. One episode dealt with a former homeless lady. One of her friends made a seemingly innocuous statement about the lady's fortune, but it was the most understanding I've run across in a while.
(Paraphrasing) "She went from homeless to owning her own house in five years. That's pretty amazing!"
Indeed, it is amazing.
I have made the slide back into employment land. That shouldn't be interpreted by anyone to mean that things have improved as far as general job prospects. I hear reports from the front lines on occasion.
However, people think that when you start making your salary that you immediately go from 0 to 60.
They like to think of sports stars who run out and buy a brand new Porsche the minute they get signed to a big contract, and they think that it applies to you--the lawyer.
First of all, let me point out that athletes have a tendency to file for bankruptcy, even when people throw millions at them. Sadly, it's like a reenactment of the movie The Jerk where everyone with a "great investment idea" comes along to pray on people who--let's face it--had help graduating from high school.
Even so, I was a tad surprised at my own situation.
Over the years, I had grown accustomed to living off of air.
It wasn't merely cooking cheaply or learning to use every last scrap of something that I previously would have never considered using. It was about usage of time.
When a person has copious free time, they become skilled at filling the long, long day with cheap or no cost activities.
There's nothing like going to a coffee shop, ordering the cheapest coffee on the menu, and taking a book that I had sitting on my shelf for 2 years and finally forcing myself to read it--even after I had lost a bit of interest.
Why? Because the alternative required spending money on a new book. That seemed a tad bit scary because it all added up over months. Today, I may buy a new book, but what would I do tomorrow? See a movie? Buy a purse? All it needed is that one chink in the dam before I went crazy.
Such a person learns to live off of ramen noodles and imagines that it will be no sweat to simply keep doing the same after assuming employment.
Yet, things change. All of the clothes that you own are old and inappropriate for work. Some have a few permanent stains from who knows what and missing clasps. Dress shoes have such natty insoles that they stick to your feet. Bras have such poor elastic that you look like your grandma. You've deferred maintenance on your car and now its demanding your attention. People at work want you to donate to the party fund and bring goodies and gifts. You start buying "real" birthday and Christmas gifts for people after essentially giving construction paper colored with crayon for the past few years. You pay for bar-related expenses. Instead of eating spaghetti and sauce that you boiled at home for lunch, you are spending money on TV dinners and take out.
Suddenly, you realize how you lived so cheaply.
It's like someone soaked one of those little green horse things in water and watched as it expanded to 200 times its size.
Thankfully, other people who owe tributes to the student loan queen understand this. It's a bigger group than those who understand that people with law degrees can be unemployed for quite some time. The group feeling the effects of student loan debt come from all shapes, colors, and backgrounds. You can go to the University of Phoenix. You can go to Harvard. It doesn't matter. Someone wants money.
On a lighter note....
As I mentioned previously, being employed means that you suddenly realize that your wardrobe is very impoverished. However, having some income means that you are confronted with a bewildering choice. Before, I stuck with J.C. Penney's because it was better than big box stores, but was still affordable. I knew what I was getting. But when I made new friends, I was introduced to the concept of outlet malls.
Yeah, yeah, I knew the old criticisms against them. They were intentionally put in out of the way locales to encourage the shopper to not leave empty-handed. The items sold were not actually marked down, so they weren't a "deal."
Do I think that a shirt at JC Penney's that was marked as originally costing $40, but now costs $28 means that I got a $40 shirt for $28? Of course not! However, I knew I was getting a $28 shirt. It's not like paying $100 for a shirt and have it fall apart like a $4 shirt after three washes.
Even so, I felt like I was having a harder time finding clothes that I liked. Call it extreme pickiness, perfectionism, snobbery, or old ladyism: I felt like I was sifting through the racks and finding little that I wanted to wear.
Therefore, I became more intrigued at the prospect of shopping at outlets. It was new. It was different. It was part of my reinvention. Even if they weren't "deals" as in that they cost what you might pay for them elsewhere, they should still be quality wares, right?
This brings up another aspect of essentially being unemployed for four years: It's a bit like the Shawshank Redemption out there.
What I understood about the quality of outlet store wares is based upon knowledge procured in 1998. I could be wrong, but my understanding is that outlets used to carry the same merchandise as they did in the main store. Now, they have created a cottage industry where they find lesser quality items and price them in a way to make you think that its about the same thing you'd find in the retail store.
At first, I felt that my change in shopping habits were rewarded. I bought what I felt was an awesome pullover sweater that was made well and evoked the look of an English professor at Oxford. It's not authentic in look, but made me happy nonetheless.
However, I was a bit troubled at the price tag.
"Similar design, $___. ___. Your cost, $___.___."
So, what was the price tag telling me? That this is a knockoff of their own item?
When I realized this, I wasn't too bothered. I bought what I thought was a relatively nice item for a price I was willing to pay.
Yet, upon multiple returns to the stores and seeing what other people were buying, I became less impress over time.
I bought a couple of shirts from a particular place that had fairly thin material. I also noticed that the labels always suggested hand washing or line drying. Since I am not very educated on these matters, I wondered if this is how "nice" clothes are supposed to be treated. I couldn't help but think that if I had bought even "nicer" clothes that I would only be able to wash them in faerie dust soap powder and dried by the gentle wind generated by the wing beats of unicorns.
Despite hand washing or flat drying as recommended, they started getting fuzz balls.
Some people I knew showed up in dresses from one particular place and bragged that they got it on close out for $15, and I secretly thought to myself that they looked like $15 dresses.
In fact, when I went to that store and looked at the non-marked down dresses that were being sold for $70, I thought they looked like $15 dresses.
I realized that I could buy something nicer at J.C. Penney's.
And what can you say, really?
Sometimes, you go to these stores that sell purses and see women congregated around the close out section. They can't afford the "real" thing, and they can't afford the knock off at "full price" (assuming they know that it's a knockoff of the "real" thing, but they probably don't care since they're only there to purchase the name brand). None of this stops them from becoming way too excited about plastic-y looking things or items covered in visible scuffs that still cost over $100.
On that note, I wonder what the insides of some of these peoples' houses look like. Would I see rafters filled with scuffed items with the price tags still on them? Would I see a stack of credit card bills?
And that's where we come full circle.
It's hard to judge people's actions without knowing their motives.
The fact that a person would buy such an item has a back story that would probably rival that of the story of a person who wouldn't buy such an item.
Even if money management drove some of the decision, buying things after not having a job for so long is a bit scary. Not simply because I have to worry about whether I will need that $50 to eat should something happen to my job. Student loans play their own part in the equation. I simply can't walk away from debt loan like I could a mortgage. Most importantly, it is bewildering after a long period of austerity to know what to do. Some people buy houses, cars, or go off to Europe the second they get some cash. I'm still in the mindset of making due with very limited resources while acknowledging that things became neglected. It's weird. I have to tell myself it's ok to buy an outfit.
(Paraphrasing) "She went from homeless to owning her own house in five years. That's pretty amazing!"
Indeed, it is amazing.
I have made the slide back into employment land. That shouldn't be interpreted by anyone to mean that things have improved as far as general job prospects. I hear reports from the front lines on occasion.
However, people think that when you start making your salary that you immediately go from 0 to 60.
They like to think of sports stars who run out and buy a brand new Porsche the minute they get signed to a big contract, and they think that it applies to you--the lawyer.
First of all, let me point out that athletes have a tendency to file for bankruptcy, even when people throw millions at them. Sadly, it's like a reenactment of the movie The Jerk where everyone with a "great investment idea" comes along to pray on people who--let's face it--had help graduating from high school.
Even so, I was a tad surprised at my own situation.
Over the years, I had grown accustomed to living off of air.
It wasn't merely cooking cheaply or learning to use every last scrap of something that I previously would have never considered using. It was about usage of time.
When a person has copious free time, they become skilled at filling the long, long day with cheap or no cost activities.
There's nothing like going to a coffee shop, ordering the cheapest coffee on the menu, and taking a book that I had sitting on my shelf for 2 years and finally forcing myself to read it--even after I had lost a bit of interest.
Why? Because the alternative required spending money on a new book. That seemed a tad bit scary because it all added up over months. Today, I may buy a new book, but what would I do tomorrow? See a movie? Buy a purse? All it needed is that one chink in the dam before I went crazy.
Such a person learns to live off of ramen noodles and imagines that it will be no sweat to simply keep doing the same after assuming employment.
Yet, things change. All of the clothes that you own are old and inappropriate for work. Some have a few permanent stains from who knows what and missing clasps. Dress shoes have such natty insoles that they stick to your feet. Bras have such poor elastic that you look like your grandma. You've deferred maintenance on your car and now its demanding your attention. People at work want you to donate to the party fund and bring goodies and gifts. You start buying "real" birthday and Christmas gifts for people after essentially giving construction paper colored with crayon for the past few years. You pay for bar-related expenses. Instead of eating spaghetti and sauce that you boiled at home for lunch, you are spending money on TV dinners and take out.
Suddenly, you realize how you lived so cheaply.
It's like someone soaked one of those little green horse things in water and watched as it expanded to 200 times its size.
Thankfully, other people who owe tributes to the student loan queen understand this. It's a bigger group than those who understand that people with law degrees can be unemployed for quite some time. The group feeling the effects of student loan debt come from all shapes, colors, and backgrounds. You can go to the University of Phoenix. You can go to Harvard. It doesn't matter. Someone wants money.
On a lighter note....
As I mentioned previously, being employed means that you suddenly realize that your wardrobe is very impoverished. However, having some income means that you are confronted with a bewildering choice. Before, I stuck with J.C. Penney's because it was better than big box stores, but was still affordable. I knew what I was getting. But when I made new friends, I was introduced to the concept of outlet malls.
Yeah, yeah, I knew the old criticisms against them. They were intentionally put in out of the way locales to encourage the shopper to not leave empty-handed. The items sold were not actually marked down, so they weren't a "deal."
Do I think that a shirt at JC Penney's that was marked as originally costing $40, but now costs $28 means that I got a $40 shirt for $28? Of course not! However, I knew I was getting a $28 shirt. It's not like paying $100 for a shirt and have it fall apart like a $4 shirt after three washes.
Even so, I felt like I was having a harder time finding clothes that I liked. Call it extreme pickiness, perfectionism, snobbery, or old ladyism: I felt like I was sifting through the racks and finding little that I wanted to wear.
Therefore, I became more intrigued at the prospect of shopping at outlets. It was new. It was different. It was part of my reinvention. Even if they weren't "deals" as in that they cost what you might pay for them elsewhere, they should still be quality wares, right?
This brings up another aspect of essentially being unemployed for four years: It's a bit like the Shawshank Redemption out there.
What I understood about the quality of outlet store wares is based upon knowledge procured in 1998. I could be wrong, but my understanding is that outlets used to carry the same merchandise as they did in the main store. Now, they have created a cottage industry where they find lesser quality items and price them in a way to make you think that its about the same thing you'd find in the retail store.
At first, I felt that my change in shopping habits were rewarded. I bought what I felt was an awesome pullover sweater that was made well and evoked the look of an English professor at Oxford. It's not authentic in look, but made me happy nonetheless.
However, I was a bit troubled at the price tag.
"Similar design, $___. ___. Your cost, $___.___."
So, what was the price tag telling me? That this is a knockoff of their own item?
When I realized this, I wasn't too bothered. I bought what I thought was a relatively nice item for a price I was willing to pay.
Yet, upon multiple returns to the stores and seeing what other people were buying, I became less impress over time.
I bought a couple of shirts from a particular place that had fairly thin material. I also noticed that the labels always suggested hand washing or line drying. Since I am not very educated on these matters, I wondered if this is how "nice" clothes are supposed to be treated. I couldn't help but think that if I had bought even "nicer" clothes that I would only be able to wash them in faerie dust soap powder and dried by the gentle wind generated by the wing beats of unicorns.
Despite hand washing or flat drying as recommended, they started getting fuzz balls.
Some people I knew showed up in dresses from one particular place and bragged that they got it on close out for $15, and I secretly thought to myself that they looked like $15 dresses.
In fact, when I went to that store and looked at the non-marked down dresses that were being sold for $70, I thought they looked like $15 dresses.
I realized that I could buy something nicer at J.C. Penney's.
And what can you say, really?
Sometimes, you go to these stores that sell purses and see women congregated around the close out section. They can't afford the "real" thing, and they can't afford the knock off at "full price" (assuming they know that it's a knockoff of the "real" thing, but they probably don't care since they're only there to purchase the name brand). None of this stops them from becoming way too excited about plastic-y looking things or items covered in visible scuffs that still cost over $100.
On that note, I wonder what the insides of some of these peoples' houses look like. Would I see rafters filled with scuffed items with the price tags still on them? Would I see a stack of credit card bills?
And that's where we come full circle.
It's hard to judge people's actions without knowing their motives.
The fact that a person would buy such an item has a back story that would probably rival that of the story of a person who wouldn't buy such an item.
Even if money management drove some of the decision, buying things after not having a job for so long is a bit scary. Not simply because I have to worry about whether I will need that $50 to eat should something happen to my job. Student loans play their own part in the equation. I simply can't walk away from debt loan like I could a mortgage. Most importantly, it is bewildering after a long period of austerity to know what to do. Some people buy houses, cars, or go off to Europe the second they get some cash. I'm still in the mindset of making due with very limited resources while acknowledging that things became neglected. It's weird. I have to tell myself it's ok to buy an outfit.
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